Weekly Update: Back on the naughty step…

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We started last week’s email with an Emma (David), and this week will be no different as we turn our attention to Emma Dooley who hoiked up her lederhosen and headed over to Germany to compete in the Berlin Marathon this weekend. Unfortunately, Emma broke the prime rule in the Nidd Valley Rule Book: to never outshine your chairman. It pains me to say it (it doesn’t really, we are just really very excited) but Emma completed the course in an incredible 3:41:12, two minutes faster than my best time. Well done, Emma, and we hope you’re enjoying a large stein or two or restorative beer. Congratulations.


Martin Lofthouse (31:16) got the third overall at Knaresborough Crag Rat Run today, so one does have to wonder whether he is joining Adam Kirk in the doping scandal that threatens to rock Nidd Valley House. Carol Morgan (32:57) had no need of performance enhancing drugs to help her on her way in claiming 1st Lady Prize, with Ben Baird (34:14) and Mike Deacon (35:59) hot on her speedy heels.


The Holy Trinity here at the Church of Nidd Valley. Amen.

Fiona Deacon (37:06) was the second lady to finish – again, more excitement – followed by Chris Beattie (37:55), Mark Armstrong (38:10) and Sue Simpson (39:03). Treasurer Dave (40:14) made easy work of the hills, while Knaresborough native Alison Iles (41:16) was on top form as she toured her home town. Moira McTague (42:53) finished alongside the ever chatty Debbie Gibson (also 42:43), with Carolyn Easton’s (44:14) sprint finish holding Tony LC (49:16) at bay. A very well done to you all.


Now that is what I call a finish. Incredible.


Alex Patrickson did some race or other but I can’t find his results anywhere. I’ll sort this in time for next week.


This week’s parkrun tourism starts off with Phil (24:21) and Fiona (30:56) Robinson – where was Alex – at the Halifax course, and with Andy Todd (19:01) who was a lone operative up on the monastic course at Fountains. But, more importantly, Nick Smith would never forgive me for being anything less than totally positive about his performance at Harrogate parkrun today where he bagged his 100th trip through the finishing funnel. Well done, Nick (26:06)! Fingers Harris (17:36 – yeah I know, bloody hell), Martin Lofthouse (18:35) and Adam Kirk (19:28) were on hand to clear the way for his victory parade, with Dan love-that-man Eagling (20:42), Andrew Peagram (21:11), John Mitton (21:32) and Mark Armstrong (22:39) laying down strong performances on the Stray. Sue Simpson (23:01) led the girls through the finishing funnel, with Steve Newton (23:15), Christine Holleran (23:40), Marcos Montana (24:28) and Captain Centennial just behind. We round up this run with big cheers for Sarah Hughan (26:57), Debbie Dilasser (27:07), Hannah Peagram (28:12), Tony LC (30:10), Michelle Dinsdale (30:19), junior Eddie Ventress (30:29) – who marked the occasion with his first run without any walking, way to go young Edoardo! – under the eagle-eyed supervision of mum Rebecca (30:30). Well done to you all!


I see my light come shining / from then west onto the east, / any day now, any day how / I shall be released: chair@niddvalleyroadrunners.co.uk.


The Week Ahead

Oh God, its happening isn’t it? The nights are drawing in. The icy fingers of Jack Frost are taking hold round your neck – cheer up, it could be Jack the Ripper – but this can only mean one thing: hi viz vests on, please. This isn’t health and safety gone mad, it’s just the Chairman not wanting a mound of paperwork when one of you ambles out unseen under a bus on Skipton Road. You’re far too special to be flattened and I can’t afford for you to get caught up in a road traffic accident. Not until you’ve marshalled GF10 for me anyway…


If it is a Tuesday, it is a club run. So get yourself off the sofa and to the Hockey Club for 7pm. We’ll have a run round the supermarkets. You know the deal. Leave the club towards Iron Bridge, down the back pass towards ASDA, through town and past Waitrose, and from there you head over the Stray towards the Showground and Sainsburys – you can add in a detour via M&S en route if you’re feeling sparky – then up Forest Moor towards Morrisons and up to the club. There’s plenty of extensions and shortcuts to suit all inclinations and abilities, so feel free to make it up as you go along.


If you’re joining the old grumpsters in the bar afterwards on Thursday for beers and salty nuts, then you’ll want to work up an appetite first. Tell you what, get yourself to the Hockey Club for 7pm and we’ll head out down Skipton Road towards Kings Road. It’s a lovely descent from there past the Conference Centre, before heading past Wetherspoons – swift half? – and up Cold Bath Road onto Otley Road. You can hang back to the club from there, or head round Beckwith Road, Green Lane and Leadhall Lane, before turning for home. Your club, your run, your choice. See you there.


Catherine Barber will be organising a rerun of the beer mile on Friday night for those of you that have no plans for Saturday morning. You need to get yourself to the bit of the Stray by the hospital and Knaresborough Road for 7pm with a four pack of beer in your hand. I’m told by beer mile aficionados that the minimum volumes are 330ml and 4%, though if you want to up the stakes you are more than welcome. You’ll be expected to run 4x round a 400m course, each lap interspersed with a beer, so your life is very much in your own hands. Last time, we repaired to the Coach and Horses for more civilised drinking, intellectual conversation and stimulating debate, so there’s also that to look forward to. Badger Cath if you’ve got any questions.


There’s something slightly awkward about having the Grewelthorpe Multi Terrain Race in the Road Championships, but there we are. I would have thought terms like ‘road’ are pretty self-explanatory. If anyone knows who is responsible for the mishap, then please ask them to report to a senior committee member at the first opportunity. Anyway, I digress. On Sunday, we’ve got this race in the calendar and it is an absolute beauty. There’re championship points to be had along with the free lunch and flapjack. There’s nothing about this race I don’t love. If you’re going to be on the start line for 11am, then you’ll need to be here first: https://grewelthorpe.files.wordpress.com/2016/09/race-information1.pdf/. They don’t do entries on the day, so don’t try your luck.


Fell Running Phil was beside himself with excitement when he heard we have been accepted into the Hodgson Brothers Mountain Relays in the Lake District on Sunday, we had to put him on the naughty step for five minutes just to calm him down. He’s pulled together the requisite crack team of seven dedicated and experienced fell runners, weighed down by yours truly. I’ll get back to you on this one, and good luck to the rest of you.


Committee Meeting: 5 October 2016

Go on. I dare you. Just say it: enquiries@niddvalleyroadrunners.co.uk.


Parkrun Adoption: 15 October 2016

Can you help show the rest of the world what makes Nidd Valley so special (and I mean that in the fullest sense of the word ‘special’)? We’re hosting parkrun again. I’ve got a few pacing positions going (I’m desperate to fill 22 and 24 minutes, and have anything over 33 going spare), plus a wealth of jobs marshalling, scanning, beeping, sweetie-handing-outing, managing, timing, and other exciting things in  hi-viz jacket. Go on, lend us a hand: chair@niddvalleyroadrunners.co.uk.


Half Marathon: 16 October 2016

Never say I’m miserable and unkind, people, I’m giving you a bus for crying out loud. If you want to run the Bridlington Half Marathon and get some more club championship points, then you need to get yourself a number for the race. You can do that here: http://www.bridlingtonrr.co.uk/page16.html. Let me know once you’ve done that, and the Cabin Crew here at Nidd Valley Travel look forward to welcoming you on board our luxury, start of the art coach at absolutely no extra cost to you. You have no idea how good we are to you: chair@niddvalleyroadrunners.co.uk.


Guy Fawkes 10: 6 November 2016

If you have not yet confirmed you can marshal for me, then I really need you to do it ASAP. I’m assuming you can. The few hours you give on this day sustain the club for the rest of the day, it’s that simple. We really do need each and every one of you and have attached the marshal plan for your information here. If you can do it and haven’t told me, or if you can’t and have a buttock clenchingly poor excuse, then I need to hear from you: chair@niddvalleyroadrunners.co.uk.


Word to the Wise

Sometimes I wonder whether people deliberately let the innuendo slip while I’m around in an attempt to make it into the annals of wise words. Maybe so, and so congratulations to Fiona Deacon who has this week sent a picture into Nidd Valley House of Mike trimming his balls.



Night night!


Sam x


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